June 28, 2011

So yesterday and today have not been the brightest days.
Yesterday afternoon while I was cooking dinner I lost all feeling my left arm and hand, it spread to my face and tongue and finally down to my toes. I couldn't feel a thing.
Normally I would have absolutely freaked but I've had this happen many times before.
It's caused from severe migraines.
After awhile I lost vision in my right eye and my speech was slurred.
This is the firt time that this has happened so severely since Josh and I have been together so he was panic-stricken. Poor boy.
I wanted to make sure that I didn't need to go to the ER since this obviously hasn't happened since I've been pregnant.
I was told to just lie down until it went away.
In the past I've gone to the ER and they've put me on strong meds to help. Not this time - nothing.
I went in to bed at 6:30pm last night and tossed and turned, cried and writhed in pain until 3pm today.
My head is still pounding but it's not so bad.
Now I'm trying to get stuff done around the house but to no avail.
At least I had yesterday and today off from work.


On another note...
Lately we have been thinking about how we need to get into a larger group.
A larger group of friends - mainly that are our age and in the same place we are in life.
Right now all of our close friends are either alot younger than us or alot older than us. We're 19 - so you think it would be easier to feel connected to people. Not really though when everyone we know is either out partying or are settled down with a whole brood of children. There's not really anyone in-between, or in the same place we are - just starting out. I get tired of listening to "omg, we went clubbing last night and it was amazing!" to me all I think is "Sounds fun - I went home and cooked dinner and cleaned the bathroom!" Don't get me wrong - I LOVE MY LIFE! I just can't relate to the people I once could.  We have a few friends who are our age and married which is nice - but only a small few. Now, I'm not saying that we have to only socialize with people of our age, etc. - rather that we just don't have that connection with anyone who we can really relate to about things such as marriage, babies and so on. I guess that people like us are hard to find: Married at 19 and having a baby at 20.
Maybe we have to join some kind of cult to find that? Or maybe we need to stop being so boring and homely?  ;)

So, on that note, we have been talking about trying to find a new church to go to. All growing up, church was a huge part of both of our lives and we were both very involved. Since we got married in October we haven't been to church once. It's very sad. Every Sunday morning as we're both getting ready to go to work I am thinking non-stop "We need to be going to church - not work."
Josh gets paid double-time on Sundays and at my work Sunday's are considered compliance - so I have to be there pretty much every week. Not that either of those are good excuses.
The church that we were going to up until we got married was Josh's home church that he had gone to for years. It's very small - not very many young people - and the young people that are there are too young for us to really relate with. Not really any outlet for us. We both have felt like we needed something more.
So that's where we are now - trying to work out so we can have Sunday mornings off work so we can begin looking for a church that better suits us spiritually, emotionally and personally. Now that we're having a baby we want to be involved in the church as much as we can. We want to go somewhere that will grow with our growing family. A place where our baby will grow up with other babies - especially if we end up homeschooling.
When I was young my family went to a very small Methodist church - only about 30 members. I hated going to church - I couldn't grow in such a small place. I had no friends, no youth groups, nothing. When I was about 12 my family started going to a bigger church in town - about 700 members. Moving to that church was the best thing my parents could have done for me (and my brothers). There were always friends, mentors, activities. I was homeschooled so I really got all of my closest friends from that church.
Not that I'm saying that you need to go to a big church or anything - or that you need to go to a church at all to feel spiritually full. Just that you need to find something that suits you - a place where you feel comfortable and where you know your family will grow best.

Sorry for the novel people!
I blame the pregnancy hormones!

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